One year ago today, life for us changed forever. In one instance, we knew that life as we knew it would never be the same but what we didn't realize was that we also would never be the same. I can remember everything about the evening, even the clothes I was wearing because I knew I would never ever wear them again. I have re-lived that night over and over in my head wondering if there was anyway that I could have prevented it or atleast postponed it? I replay it wondering how I could have change that night so that we could have had the outcome we had hoped and prayed for but like a bad dream there is nothing that I can do to change that night. All I can do is replay it over and over again.
One year later and I have thought all day about that night. At times wondering did this really happen...no this couldn't have really happened...it must all just be a bad dream...but sadly it is not.
One year later and I can't believe that a whole year has gone by. I never thought my life would be this way...I never thought I would be this way...I never thought I would be part of the "grieving parent club" but I am.
I never really understood what they meant your life can change in an instance but now I do.
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4 comments:
Melissa,
My heart goes out to you today. The sadness and loss is intense - especially on anniversary days. You are not alone. We are praying for you - that you will feel the comfort and peace that passes all understanding.
I wish I could give you a hug.
Blessings,
Kirsten
I am thinking of you and sending prayers your way!
Melissa,
Remembering you (as I do each day) on this anniversary...it was bad enough to live it the first time around, and even sadder to think you have to relive it again...but rejoicing for Declan and Lucas's lives and that they are part of your family and more so the family of God. The Master's kids...
Know you are loved, and thought of so often...by many people...
Always,
Found you through Angie's blog. Just wanted you to know my heart goes out to you for these next couple of weeks.
It's been 8 years since I lost my baby son at 23 weeks. One day jsut wasn't enough! My heart aches for him, the pain has softened, but I grieve for him daily. God Bless You!
{hugs}
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